- Be a player in the Little League World Series or the College World Series?
- Have an affair with a Senator (a la John Edwards) or a baseball player (a la A-Rod)?
- Be stuck watching 2 hours of Sister, Sister or Moesha?
- Get a Brazilian wax or Cleveland Steamer?
- Supaman Dat Hoe or Put it in Your Mouth?
- Have sex with Jessica Simpson while her dad is watching or have sex with Ashlee Simpson while Pete Wentz is watching?
- Sustain yourself for one month on McDonald’s Filet-o-Fish sandwiches or Swanson’s Hungry Man Fried Chicken TV dinners?
- For one day, Rollerblade everywhere you went in full pads and helmet (you cannot take them off) or wear a t-shirt that says “I heart cock.” (you cannot take it off)
- Do Romy or Michele?
- Be Turtle or Drama?
- Be deaf or Canadian?
- Compete on Ninja Warrior or Most Extreme Challenge?
- Wake up and realize you had sex with someone of the same sex or wake up and realize you had sex with a relative?
- Skin a cat or eat a puppy?
- Have the flying ability that the leaf gives you in Super Mario Bros. 3 and be able to fly high enough to reach the line of coins that resides above the clouds and then slowly descend onto a group of bricks where you find safe harbor from a fireball-spitting Venus Flytrap or have Luigi’s supermega jumping ability from Super Mario Bros. 2 and kick your legs around furiously while reaching the island with the potion at the end of level 4-2 that warps you to level 6?
- Read this blog or eat an entire box of Cocoa Puffs in one sitting (you cannot drink the milk)?
Currently listening to: Outkast – Return of the “G”